dear u,
i had a dream about you. it broke my heart, you hugged me and you were happy, i even saw your dad. you were in my neighborhood? i was crying and i was scared, i hate not having answers. i always feel the need to blame someone. i love you like a best friend because you hurt me, but i cant understand why i still do? my girlfriend is so lovely and so supportive and sweet? i wish i hated you because it would make all this curiosity stop, you would get out of my brain . you even looked how you do and that never happens ? my life is kind of going down hill aside from having my girlfriend. my grades are not great, my gpa is a 2.6. i’m probably feeling this way because i’m on my period and we both know that when i hit my period, i was suicidal. i just want to hug my girlfriend, man. i want to cry into her shoulder and i want to hug her and just forget everything but her embrace and HER. it’s helping me move on, though: looking through your posts and seeing you grow. it makes me feel sane to know that things are going okay for you relationship wise because seeing you single feels like my fault. it is my fault, but i just don’t like it. i just want you to find your happiness and trust in someone like i have because you deserve it. i still blame myself and tell myself i was the broken gear in the relationship, i was . my friends tell me sometimes that you were the abusive one because you called me names and you grew toxic, which if i really think about it, makes sense? i drove you insane and that is incredible in the worst way. i’m glad i’m away from you because i’m okay now?